


[fic] with grace in your heart and flowers in your hair

by silly_cleo



Series: Critical Role Femslash Week 2019 [1]
Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Critical Role Femslash Week, F/F, Femslash, Flowers, Grief/Mourning, Polyamory, Pre-Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-16
Updated: 2019-01-16
Packaged: 2019-10-11 08:40:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17443607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/silly_cleo/pseuds/silly_cleo
Summary: "Yasha has never seen flowers like these before. "





	[fic] with grace in your heart and flowers in your hair

Yasha has never seen flowers like these before. 

As far as she’s ranged since the Stormlord took her in, this jungle might be the furthest from Xhorhas she’s ever been. Everything about the Menagerie Coast seems alien to her, and she feels something almost like excitement at the sight of all these strange, vibrant colours. The change of scene helps too, this landscape couldn’t be more different from where she last parted ways with the Mighty Nein. From where she left Molly. 

No, that wound is too new to look at yet, so she pushes it aside and focuses on the flowers around her once more, trying to find the perfect one for Zuala, the one that will show her what this part of Yasha’s journey looked like, this place that’s so far from where either of them came from, and so much further from home than either of them ever thought they’d need to go. That wound hurts too, she doesn’t see how it could ever stop hurting, but this hurt is at least not quite as fresh, so it’s easier to turn over in her mind.

What she finds is a small flower whose petals almost look like birds’ wings, the same colour as Jester’s skin, its’ white centre peeking out like Jester’s teeth when she laughs. The thought catches her by surprise, and that one thought sparks another, leads her to thinking of the rest of the Nein, and where they might be, and what they might be doing, but it’s much too close to thinking about them doing it without Molly, and while the flower is beautiful, just like Jester, it’s clearly not the right one.

She continues to search, until she comes across another cluster of flowers, these ones are small, with petals spread out like morning stars, and just like that she’s thinking of Beau, of giving her those stars in Zadash, the first present she’d given a woman who wasn’t Zuala, even if only by mistake. Of seeing her use them in battle, all whirling grace and compact energy. She pushes that thought aside too and keeps searching. The breathless ache in her chest watching Beau fight, or seeing Jester laugh doesn’t matter in the least - she had Zuala, and they could never replace her.

She pushes through the jungle for the rest of that day, keeping an eye out for a jungle flower for Zuala, but none of them seem quite right. She knows where she’s heading, roughly, though she doesn’t always know why. There’s a storm coming, she can smell it on the air. Storms don’t always mean messages from the Stormlord, but she finds them comforting all the same.

She climbs up into the canopy, to get a view of the way ahead. There’s a large city on the horizon, and behind it, endlessly vast and sparkling, she can see the sea. She’ll be in Nicodranas by tomorrow. One last night alone in the wilderness, with no other people to deal with.

Later, when she stumbles across the Mighty Nein so far from where she left them, she’ll wonder if this time, they’re what the Stormlord sent her to find.


End file.
